Charting the Course
I did however manage to go to Staples and purchase a 3 ring binder, (maroon) paper punch, highlighters, packs of paper and a new cartridge for the laser printer.
I even printed out every story double spaced and placed them in chronological order of a sort and placed them in the 3 ring binder.
A beautifully written blessing was sent along I could place inside the binder by SerenityTide.
I then brought the package to my shrink and received her blessing.
Was I ready to start? Should have been, but nope.
The excuses began rolling in...
1. Jury Duty
2. Jury Trial
3. Cold or Allergies
4. Dinners I had to accept (yeh,right)
5. Sleepless nights
6. TV I just couldn't miss (never mind I have TIVO)
You name it, I always came up with a reason to begin "tomorrow."
Last night GoMama called and we commiserated about writing, blah, blah, blah.
I casually mentioned that I had taken her advice and gone to Staples and did this and that and I now had this "entity" sitting on my desk.
She was taken by suprise. I said that I had emailed her a week or so ago to tell her of the first steps taken. She said she hadn't received any email, but that this was indeed big news (I found out this morning I had sent it to the wrong address).
What she said next struck a chord.
"You did it." "You finished the chart."
"You fu-king finished the chart Jennfier had us do at the workshop in Portland!"
This morning, as I was cleaning the dog hair and what seemed like hundreds of copies of various stories printed, out of my computer studio, I came across the chart.
There it was, rolled up and creased from traveling back to Connecticut with all the stickies I had placed there. 12 points on an astrological chart with each sector representing what I wanted to write- the events, the characters in my life, and the final stickie, what I hoped to acheive by writing.
It was all there. I really had done it.
The very last stickie on the chart startled me.
It said simply, "I am happy."
So today I will begin the rewrite. Happy but scared.
I promise myself.